I survived through Wednesday. I don’t know how I did, but there were probably some casualties.
The instructor made a quick-ish study guide for the test, and I went through it and did all I could from it, but there were a lot on the test that was not on the study guide. I’m a little disappointed about that since I am usually strapped for time and tried to take the most use of that study guide, like I did the previous test (which I got a 92 on), but I got a 79 on this test. It’s still passing, and it’s still better than my test scores when I went to LSU, I just had higher hopes for this test.
After the test, I went to work at the coffeehouse, and there was nothing done from the closing duties, so I had to put on the shift leader pants and delegate like no other. Times like this, I am the not so fun party crasher, but at least we were out before 11pm, so they can’t complain too much. And if they do, well, I’m only there 1-2 times a week, so I won’t have to hear about it too much.
Today at the primary job, I got summoned by HR to take pictures of this donation/luncheon event that was going on. I am severely socially awkward. I don’t like getting up in people’s spaces, I kind of like to keep my distance. I won’t be rude and not talk to you, but I will fully engage conversation with someone if they seem to want to talk to me. I’m just not good at being the initiator.
The one time I tried initiating was in 7th grade. There was this small group of chicks that seemed pretty cool. They were real into Spice Girls, and so was I. So I tried to use that to help get myself in and make friends. I thought things were going pretty well for a while, but one of them asked me to not hang around with them anymore.
The online world has really helped with my awkward-ness. I feel more confident behind a screen, talking with people, getting to know them, etc. At least, if they don’t want to talk to me, they can just ignore my messages and not have to go through the awkward run of telling me to not hang around anymore. I wish I had the time to fully engage online again. I really liked having friends from all over the world and hearing about the things going on in their lives.
I feel so out of the internet loop that I don’t know where people go to get to know others anymore. Livejournal used to be so active and I made a bunch of friends through mutual communities that have eventually faded out. I still have a couple friends from here that I added on Facebook and Instagram, and I enjoy being able to see what they’re up to. Talking isn’t what it used to be, but I’m glad that they haven’t fully cut me out of their loops like some others have.
Maybe I’ll make that a resolution for 2016, relearn how to use Livejournal again like I used to, and to stay out of doctor’s offices